We are so used to talking about things that will make us happy, fulfilled and satisfied in our careers, relationships and in the long run generally. But there is something very important that we don’t talk about. Its either we think they don’t matter or we are simply afraid to talk about them. Most people will say they want to be happy and live amicably with people. Most of us claim we want to be happy to have meaningful lives, enjoy ourselves, experience fulfilment, and share love and friendship with other people but funny enough most act as if they want to be miserable and somehow succeed in inviting misery into their lives and giving it their master bedroom.
Is it not weird? I mean how will someone invite misery into their life and give it a big space when they are not gaining anything from MISERY? Being miserable doesn’t help you find a good job, doesn’t let you love or fall in love, doesn’t allow you pray, doesn’t allow you make more money so why do you do this? Does anyone have an answer to why some people invite misery into their lives when we all should give it a “QUIT NOTICE”? Its very easy to detect misery in some people but a lot more difficult to detect it in those who mask it and pretend that they are happy.
When you have misery as a chief occupant in your life, you make people feel so guilty and sorry for you. When you are miserable, it means you have given up on trying and you are hopeless and as such can never be disappointed by anything you see ever again.
Today what I want to talk about are some of those things that make you miserable or how to know you are miserable: 1. FEAR: Nagging fear of the unknown. Fear of losing one’s job, going broke and not accomplishing your goals can make you feel so miserable even when there is no cause for alarm. I tell you, when you are too scared of the unknown I mean terribly scared, you are using up the energy you should have used for effective work on fear. Yes, you expend a lot of energy, thinking and not acting. Fear cripples you! Fear becomes a priority in your life. FEAR makes one miserable.
2. LOOKING OUT FOR FLAWS AND BAD SIDES OF EVERYTHING: Always looking out for bad, ugly or negative sides in everything is a sign that you are miserable. Misery makes you find the bad in any good you throw their way. Miserable people will point out the bad in any situation simply for the sake of spoiling the mood. Miserable people like to bring others down to their level, usually by pointing out everything they find wrong or unappealing about a person. They will quickly point out your insecurities and pretend like they didn’t know what they were doing.
But they did know what they were doing. They wanted to see your reaction, to see if your mood could be worsened in order to be up to par with theirs.
Miserable people like to make themselves believe the world really is as ugly as they see it, so they go pointing out the flaws and waiting for someone to agree with them, reaffirming their beliefs that what they are looking at really is as ugly and awful as they believe it to be.
3. ALL YOUR FRIENDS ARE MISERABLE: Miserable people seem to make friends more with other miserable people. I am not sure whether they find themselves friends who already happen to be miserable or if they turn their happy friends into miserable ones, but those who hang out with miserable people tend to be very miserable themselves.
4. YOU DO THINGS YOU HOPE WOULD DISTRACT YOU: A lot of miserable people drink too much, smoke too much, indulge in a lot of sex, spend a lot of time watching TV, reading for a long time etc. You know what they are trying to do? They are trying to get away from something they can’t get away from. But unfortunately, Reality is not a choice! it is a state of existence. You exist and function within reality whether you like it or not. Trying to get away from it will only make you more miserable.
5. THEY DON’T FIND IT HARD BEING NASTY TO PEOPLE: No matter how nice you are to a miserable person, they will always be nasty and rude to you. They give you an attitude. Its not you dear. Its them. 6. MISERABLE DON’T LOVE THEMSELVES AND THINK THEY ARE THE BEST IN THE WORLD: They don’t love themselves. It may be just due to one flaw they have noticed about themselves a highest regard.
7. THEY HATE TO SEE PEOPLE HAPPY: Miserable people would do much better trying to figure out how it is that happy people can be as happy as they are, instead of telling them they shouldn’t be happy that if they were smarter, more intelligent, they would be just as miserable as they.
Miserable people really do exist and masking misery doesn’t mean that you are happy about who you are. Its best for you to thoroughly search yourself… Chase this evil occupant a quit notice today! Misery is not worth your happiness! It has no advantage what so ever. Forget that job you lost, forget about that broken relationship, forget about that business that went back, please try and forget about your dead wife and husband and move on with your life.
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MARILYN ANONA writes: Miserable people don’t like themselves very much, but their egos still force them to hold themselves in the highest regard.